Archive for the ‘life’ Category

Dreaming of living

A number of years ago, if you said to me that i would own and run my own company, i would have stopped listening and carried on doing whatever it was that I was doing. This is because of one simple fact: I did not know how to dream.

Wait, wait. We all know how to dream. We all drwam or have in the past, about a big house with matching car and the whole family happier than ever. This “dream” is not real. It happens so rarely that i would say it never does. 

The dream I am talking about is a real dream. Ie: if certain actions by an ordinary person are performed, it will happen. These dreams may not be lavish or what you would expect them to be though. For some people, these dreams may take years to achieve but to others it happe s every day. Dreams are about you and are relative to your situation.

There are also no time limits on dreams. They can be short term or long term. In fact, it’s good practice to have short terms dreams that up that long term picture. An example could be of someone who has been seriously ill eg: with cancer who wants to run a 10km race. Short term the dream would be to be healthy enough to go home from hospital. Next, it would be clearance from doctors to start exercising. You know where i am going here. For others, be healthy  is a given each day.

The best dream is one that allows you to love life and everything it your life. This isthe dream that enables you to live. This may be simple or complex but the end result is the same. This may be scary and many may mot take that first step. This dream is worth every scary moment.

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Push yourself

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That box

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The new year ishere andthe resilutions are on everybody’s lips. Have you made any?

Better question is: should you really made them?

Far too many people make all sorts of resolutions which, I believe, they actually have no intention of keeping. There are 3 types of resolutions that are made:

1. Resolutions that are made and kept.

2. Resolutions that are made but not quite kept. Eg: you want to lose 25kg and, despite your best efforts, you lost 20kg. 

3. Resolutions that are made with no intentions of being kept.

Number 1 and 2 are great. You got up and changed something in order to get to your resolution. You may not get to it but you gave it your best shot. You can only try your best. Many outside factors can affect this process.

Number 3, however, is a different story. This can happen can for any aspect of life but, more odten than not, it involvesthe fatal words of “diet” and “exercise”. 

Examples. I want to be more healthy. I want to go to gym more often. I want to lose 20kg. The list is endless. These often sound like excuses or something that you “should be” doing rather than wanting to do them.

The way to see if you are making the correct resolutions are the responses that you have at the end of the year. 

1. Nailed it! Let’s do it again. 

2. Oh so close, i will tweak it slightly and nail it this year.

3. Yes, i did but i really should ……. blah blah excuse.

The best thing about resolutions is that they are never cast in stone. They can be revised to a certain degree, not completely and not to suit you not wanting to do it! 

Example: you set your resolution at running a marathon in the next year. You are training well and everything is on course. Then you sustain an injury that halts your training for 2 months. The year ends with the resolution not being met. The outside factor changed the outcome but the real motive behind it was met. That is the training, healthy eating and good rest. 

Resolutions are and can be incredible life changing promises to yourself and all your friends and family but only if you really want them to happen.

Last question: are you really going to do that? If not, don’t say it, you are only fooling yourself. 

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​There is only one investment that is guaranteed to make a gain in life. That is the investment in family. There are a lot of people to invest in but there are mainly 3 of these people that exist being yourself, your partner and your kids. You could write a whole book on yourself and your partner and this subject is beyond the scope of this book. The focus here is investing in your kids. Not one person has ever looked back over their life and said, “I wish I had worked harder”. If they do say that, then they are just not great people to be around.

You can invest for them such as saving for their education or their long term future. This is fantastic and I would really encourage this because it really does show you care about their well being later in life, perhaps after have passed away. Unfortunately, this is a perfect scenario that cannot always be carried out in the situation you or your family are in.

There are 2 options to make sure they are looked after.

1. Make sure your will is up to date. I am no expert in this and I would suggest a lawyer or attorney for this advice but making sure your will is in order, tells people that you have thought about your death ahead of time. This may sound backward but it will save them a huge amount of time, money and hassle subsequent to your passing.

2. Make memories.

Make the kind of memories that will stay with them forever. Perhaps you will learn a few things too! This type of memory does not have to be long, fancy overseas trips or extravagant gifts. Yes, those are nice but in 40 years time, will they be able to remember what present they got for their 4th birthday?

The type of memories i am talking about here is the kind of memory that they will tell their kids and grandkids and they will passed on through the generations. an example is that they will always remember talking to family and friends around the kitchen table. My kids are already got memories that will stay with them. They know that Daddy goes cycling and they go and watch me. My daughter even asks if I am going with granddad because I ride with my dad so often. These are small things when you single them out but they will last forever.

The investment in family is the only investment that will not fail or depreciate and in fact, it will only grow. It will even continue to grow after you pass away.

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BHAG 2017

Dont worry, this is not some dodgy religious, extremist group, but rather a very good idea to sit and ponder over. 

So what is it? Here is the breakdown:
H airy
A udacious
G oal
Have a good think as to what you really want in the next year (or less) and write it down. Keep in the front of your mind that these goals should fit ALL the criteria above. 
By thinking of these goals, you may get a bit scared and prefer to go for a more conservative goal but why should you? You want to do something that is amazing in life and in particular in the next 12 months so why not go big, hairy and audacious
How do you know if it fits all the criteria?  
1. You cannot choose something you have done before. What’s the point of that?
2. You must believe that you can do it. A tough one this but you will know deep down if you can do it.
3. These are goals that you have been thinking about for a long time. More often  than not, we talk ourselves out of these goals.
And last but possibly the most importantly, 
4. When you tell people about these goals, they will think that they are either stupid and out of reach or plain impossible. That is the reactio  you want. 
Personally, I love it when people say it’s impossible because that gives me the perfect motivation to do it. There is nothing proving people wrong and showing them that you can do it despite what they think.
A word of advice here,  have a strong support structure to be behind you through the process because with the nature of the goals, you will meet adversity and constant negativity drom everyone around.  tou need some support to keep you on the path.

So what are your BHAG for the next 12 months? Write them down and share them! Then one thing is left to do: do whatever it takes to achieve those goals.

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Write the post and in fact I would prefer for you to write two or three, then email it to me and I will approve it and will then publish it!


Happy writing

Email: brucelaister@gmail.com

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